So I thought I would put up the music that I have been really digging for the week. There have been a lot of songs that I have been just keep listening to throughout the week.
First is Pink's So What. I just love this song and for some reason love the beat on this.
Second, is Danity Kane's Bad Girl. I have the cd and love listening to this song.
I just to be a Britney Spears fan when I was younger. Then the last couple albums she has put out I hated. When her new song Womanizer came out, I really enjoyed. It has a great beat and I always want to dance in my chair.
The last one is Taylor Swifts Love Story. I love her music and this one is another smash. I couldnt find a good one to post in my blog.
October 11, 2008
September 30, 2008
Been a while
I have been so bad with my blog lately. I plan on spending some time this weekend and updated my blog. I will give just a short redown on whats been going on. In the last month I have celebrated my 1 year anniversary, had some friends that have been having some problems. Also I am not sure it is something I am going to make into a post but this past couple of months I have turned into someone I just despises. I used to be this happy upbeat person and lately I come tired, crabby, and just a bitter person. Anymore at work I sometimes get annoyed with people quicker and other days I dont want do deal with anyone. Even driving home, people annoy me more and more. Little things that people do drive me crazy more than usual. Those days I wish I had a tank to either shot out their tires so they can't drive anymore or so I can run over their car. I dont know what the deal is anymore I have a feeling most of it comes from losing my hair. People keep looking at me like I have some type of disease and I hate it. I dont know what is going on and dont worry people you can not catch it.
Also with that I dont feel like I fit in or belong. I know that comes from shutting out my friends and my family, especially my family. I used to be so close with my family and ever since the 4th of July I feel like I have drifted away from them. I hardly ever talk to them and I know I need to but I just dont feel like it. I hate that I have cut myself off from my friends because now I am finally at a point that I am ready to start going back out and the friends that I do have I have pushed away. I am at point too that I am not comfortable with my body. I think I am at my heaviest I have ever been. And I hate that, I just want to feel beautiful and pretty again. I know I have made my husbands life hell because of that. I dont feel like half the time being lovey dovey with him. I just hoping that this mood can change and I can go back to my oldself. So look for more updates this weekend.
Also with that I dont feel like I fit in or belong. I know that comes from shutting out my friends and my family, especially my family. I used to be so close with my family and ever since the 4th of July I feel like I have drifted away from them. I hardly ever talk to them and I know I need to but I just dont feel like it. I hate that I have cut myself off from my friends because now I am finally at a point that I am ready to start going back out and the friends that I do have I have pushed away. I am at point too that I am not comfortable with my body. I think I am at my heaviest I have ever been. And I hate that, I just want to feel beautiful and pretty again. I know I have made my husbands life hell because of that. I dont feel like half the time being lovey dovey with him. I just hoping that this mood can change and I can go back to my oldself. So look for more updates this weekend.
August 30, 2008
Dear Drivers
Since I have been driving over to Maryland Heights for about 6 months now, I have noticed a few things that drives me crazy about other drivers.
Dear drivers that use the fast lane, the fast lane is exactly for that purpose for faster coming traffic. If you a)are not going the speed limit or b) see that cars are backing up behind you then you need to get over. I understand that at time you were faster than other cars but you can get over especially if it is a two lane high way. This isn't a lets go take a Sunday drive, some people have places to go. If I honk my horn at you that isnt hey hows it going. It means the cars on the other side are going slower and you are too so get over.
Now on the opposite end, dear driver that think they are a Indy car racecar driver. There are speed limits for a reason. I dont mind going when people go over the speed limit, heck I do it, but you dont have to go so fast that you are bout ready to crash into someone or cause accident. If you are that much in a hurry to get somewhere you shouldnt be on the road or you should have left sooner.
Dear police officer, why is that you want to target me when I am driving?? The said two above are going to cause more problems then me. I am not the one who is going 80 to 95 miles weaving in between traffic on the interstate. At most I am going 70 in 65 speed zone. It just gets frustrating when you are pointing your gun at me and the person in the next lane is going faster than me.
I am tired of people that do not know how to use their turn signals. How do I know that you aren't just stopping the middle of the road? And dont get mad when I honk at you for not your turn signal. If you would have used it I wouldnt have to honk at you. So if you follow some of these rules I think would not have problems!!
Dear drivers that use the fast lane, the fast lane is exactly for that purpose for faster coming traffic. If you a)are not going the speed limit or b) see that cars are backing up behind you then you need to get over. I understand that at time you were faster than other cars but you can get over especially if it is a two lane high way. This isn't a lets go take a Sunday drive, some people have places to go. If I honk my horn at you that isnt hey hows it going. It means the cars on the other side are going slower and you are too so get over.
Now on the opposite end, dear driver that think they are a Indy car racecar driver. There are speed limits for a reason. I dont mind going when people go over the speed limit, heck I do it, but you dont have to go so fast that you are bout ready to crash into someone or cause accident. If you are that much in a hurry to get somewhere you shouldnt be on the road or you should have left sooner.
Dear police officer, why is that you want to target me when I am driving?? The said two above are going to cause more problems then me. I am not the one who is going 80 to 95 miles weaving in between traffic on the interstate. At most I am going 70 in 65 speed zone. It just gets frustrating when you are pointing your gun at me and the person in the next lane is going faster than me.
I am tired of people that do not know how to use their turn signals. How do I know that you aren't just stopping the middle of the road? And dont get mad when I honk at you for not your turn signal. If you would have used it I wouldnt have to honk at you. So if you follow some of these rules I think would not have problems!!
High School Reunion
So the first Friday of August was my high school reunion. It was a celebrating 25 years of being open and it was not for a certain class. It was a reunion for Governor French Academy. I went there from 1997 to 2001 and had a graduating class of 9. That's right, 9 kids!! In our entire school, which was pre-K to 12th grade there was probably about 200 kids. It was really small school but I would not change a thing. I ended up having the best time of my life. So my best friend Mary Beth met me at my high school and went had dinner before hand in downtown Belleville. It was so good catching up with her and reliving old days. We were also talking about who we wanted to see there and who we didn't. Then we decided we should head on over there and get this sucker over with. We had gone to something like this but when we went was after her sisters graduation and it sucked. We really thought this one was going to be bad. When we got there one of my best guy friends and his girlfriend had shown up. I was so glad to see them. I knew there would be someone else there to talk to besides Mary Beth.
When we got there, there was not alot of people, more teachers than anything. They gave us name tags with our senior pictures and what year we graduated. That was a so embrassing. Throughout the night more people that I knew came trickling in. Then finally my other best guy friend came. I was so excited. Jonathan, Mary Beth, my brother and I were so close throughout the years. My senior year we had date nights with the two Jonathans. He didn't get to come to my wedding which was sad. But I was so glad to see him. Our headmaster or "our principal" took us on a tour of the school. There had been some changes since I had last been there. It was neat remembering though how things had been when I originally started there. While on the tour I ended up dropping my camera. I was so mad that I dropped it. After the tour I stood around talking with old friends. One of my old boyfriends was there. And we ended up having a really good conversation that night. I was really surprised how late I had stayd there since I really thought it was going to be boring. A group of us ended up going to a bar. Mary Beth and I had our normal drink at this bar. It is called a recliner. Basically they take a sandpail and put a bunch of liquor there. We get it every summer because that is the only time they serve it at the location we go to. It ended up being Josh, Mary Beth, Byron and his girlfriend Jesi. Before Byron and Jesi got there Josh had made a comment that he was surprised that Byron and I were friends. That really got me thinking about that. I am not surprised that we have been friends that long. I dont remember how we became friends but I am glad we did. Byron has been there for me over the years, especially during the boyfriend years when I have had boy troubles. I know I haven't been the greatest friend to him but I am so glad he has been there for me and stuck by me throughout the years. So all in all it was a great night.
When we got there, there was not alot of people, more teachers than anything. They gave us name tags with our senior pictures and what year we graduated. That was a so embrassing. Throughout the night more people that I knew came trickling in. Then finally my other best guy friend came. I was so excited. Jonathan, Mary Beth, my brother and I were so close throughout the years. My senior year we had date nights with the two Jonathans. He didn't get to come to my wedding which was sad. But I was so glad to see him. Our headmaster or "our principal" took us on a tour of the school. There had been some changes since I had last been there. It was neat remembering though how things had been when I originally started there. While on the tour I ended up dropping my camera. I was so mad that I dropped it. After the tour I stood around talking with old friends. One of my old boyfriends was there. And we ended up having a really good conversation that night. I was really surprised how late I had stayd there since I really thought it was going to be boring. A group of us ended up going to a bar. Mary Beth and I had our normal drink at this bar. It is called a recliner. Basically they take a sandpail and put a bunch of liquor there. We get it every summer because that is the only time they serve it at the location we go to. It ended up being Josh, Mary Beth, Byron and his girlfriend Jesi. Before Byron and Jesi got there Josh had made a comment that he was surprised that Byron and I were friends. That really got me thinking about that. I am not surprised that we have been friends that long. I dont remember how we became friends but I am glad we did. Byron has been there for me over the years, especially during the boyfriend years when I have had boy troubles. I know I haven't been the greatest friend to him but I am so glad he has been there for me and stuck by me throughout the years. So all in all it was a great night.
July 22, 2008
Gateway weekend
So this is a little late but I have been so worn out and been busy with work as well. This weekend was the Busch series race at Gateway International racetrack. I am at all this races every time they have a major race. My dad has a raceway ministry program so if someone gets hurt we are there or if they need anything. It was a little hot but luckily there was a breeze blowing through. And most of the day I get to spend in driving around in a golf cart or in their media center eating free food. I got to try a local ice cream (I forget the name it was Blue something and made her locally). They had a White Cake that tasted like White cake with frosting. It was so creamy and smelled wonderful. Then the other flavors they had was Double Chocolate (that was good), Caramel (I am not a fan of caramel but I enjoyed it surprisingly) and then Mandarin Orange (it tasted like a Dreamcicle bar).
Before the race I got to be down in the winners circle. They have the driver introductions there and where the person that prayers, national anthem is sung and the people say Gentlemen start their engines. Dad was praying before the race so he had me come down there and sit with so I could get some pics. Dad got to go up stage and shake the drivers hands. All of sudden this guy comes and sits down next to me before dad was to go up there. Dad starts taking pics of this guy and I am like ok thats weird. He whispered in my ear I will tell you later why. So when they do the introductions, he goes up there. It turns out the man was Jason Keller. He is pretty big driver in the Busch series.
So right before dad was going to pray the power goes at the track. They had to use some generators to help power some parts of the track. It was funny, they had to use the mics from the radio station and ESPN to broadcast the prayer and such. And you could hear the people buzzing in the stands about whats going on. Here is a video clip of the gal singing hopefully it will give an idea of whats going on.
Then the best part was the winner of the race Carl Edwards. He is one of the nicest and one of the cuter NASCAR drivers. He always takes his time out for his fans. Plus he is from an area near St Louis. It is always good to see a person from the area win.
When he wins he always does a back flip from his car and so I thought I would post that for you to enjoy.
Before the race I got to be down in the winners circle. They have the driver introductions there and where the person that prayers, national anthem is sung and the people say Gentlemen start their engines. Dad was praying before the race so he had me come down there and sit with so I could get some pics. Dad got to go up stage and shake the drivers hands. All of sudden this guy comes and sits down next to me before dad was to go up there. Dad starts taking pics of this guy and I am like ok thats weird. He whispered in my ear I will tell you later why. So when they do the introductions, he goes up there. It turns out the man was Jason Keller. He is pretty big driver in the Busch series.
So right before dad was going to pray the power goes at the track. They had to use some generators to help power some parts of the track. It was funny, they had to use the mics from the radio station and ESPN to broadcast the prayer and such. And you could hear the people buzzing in the stands about whats going on. Here is a video clip of the gal singing hopefully it will give an idea of whats going on.
Then the best part was the winner of the race Carl Edwards. He is one of the nicest and one of the cuter NASCAR drivers. He always takes his time out for his fans. Plus he is from an area near St Louis. It is always good to see a person from the area win.
When he wins he always does a back flip from his car and so I thought I would post that for you to enjoy.
Sad Day
I just read on yahoo news that Estelle Getty from Golden Girls died. She was 84 years old. One of my favorite shows was Golden Girls and she was on one my favorite movies Mannequin. She was always so funny and gave the show some great parts on the show. I thought I would just post a clip of some of great moments.
July 10, 2008
Debbie Downer
So that is exactly how I have been lately. And to all my readers I don't mean to be. It is just that I am going through a lot and it really has been getting to me. If you are have read my blog, I was having problems with losing my hair. When I first found the spot on the back of my head it was a little bit bigger than a quarter. I was going to the doctor. I was getting cortzoid shots in the bald spot. Let me tell you that hurts so bad. It feels like someone is kicking you in the back of the head when they get down with the shots. So during the time it started to get worse so the dermatologist put me on a steroid for a month. Again that did not help and it was still getting worse. I went to my primary care doctor and he is having me go get blood work done to see if there is something else causing it. So now my spot is huge and still getting worse. Now this is all happening under the hair on the crown of my head. I am bald on my left side of my head and there is about 1/4 of hair on my right side. Now I have found another spot on the top of my head which is about the size of a quarter. And when people see my hair they all look at me that I have some disease and want to be near me. It is so embrassing. I can't help what is going and if I knew what was trust me I would take something to help it. I have already decided that if it gets worse I am shaving my hair off and getting a wig. I thought I would have be doing that when I get old but now when I am in my 20s. On top of that I am so tired and at times my body hurts. I know this sounds bad or weird but I really hope my blood work comes back and they find something. I just want to know what is going on with my body.
So I want to apologize to the people who have been wondering about me, emailing me, calling me etc. I just haven't felt like dealing with people cause I just have been so worn out and in a depressed state. Things are getting better and I am starting to feel a bit better. The hardest thing for me is just having people there that understand what I am going through. It is so hard because I just want to someone to not freak out when I tell about and then show them whats going on. I really need a shoulder to lean on during this. I promise from now on my blogs will be more positive. And I have a lot this weekend to write about.
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